Welcome!

You will be redirected in 30 seconds or close now.

ColdFusion Authors: Yakov Fain, Jeremy Geelan, Maureen O'Gara, Nancy Y. Nee, Tad Anderson

Related Topics: ColdFusion, Microservices Expo, Agile Computing, Release Management

ColdFusion: Blog Feed Post

Christmas Could Never Get Started Today

Christmas would be doomed before it ever got started

This time of year is a favorite for children of all ages – I happen to be one of these kids – in part because of the television programs that are shown around Christmas.

A Charlie Brown Christmas, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, and How the Grinch Stole Christmas, have been favorites of mine since TV went from exclusively black and white to poor quality color. This is no coincidence as these programs were made in the mid 1960’s.

As I was watching this year, it occurred to me that if at this time in history Christmas had not yet been established, if somehow Christmas needed to be “started” in 2009, it wouldn’t stand a chance. Christmas would be doomed before it ever got started.

First of all, the only time you can say Jesus Christ anymore is when you hit your thumb with a hammer.

You can’t mention Him at City Hall, you can’t display a crèche at the Court House, it’s at least passé, and at most completely offensive, to pray in Jesus’ name except at a Nascar race south of the Mason Dixon line, and the President would incur enormous wrath from the press if he dared mention the Savior’s name in anyway other than passing or pandering for political gain – not that we have to worry about the current president properly and appropriately speaking the name of Jesus.

You can say “what the hell” on TV and if there is a “goddammit” in the movie it isn’t bleeped out. Interestingly enough you can also say the word “shit” without consequence. However, Jesus Christ, the standard for when time crosses from BC to AD is spoken of as a myth, as a constant source of ridicule, or feared so greatly that His name is not permitted to be spoken if it crosses the non-existent, yet simultaneously ambiguous, standard/line of “separation of church and state”. Apparently the goal is to take Jesus Christ completely out of Christmas. It seems pretty clear that removing Christ from Christmas leaves only a word that Roberto Duran understands. Remember when he quit in his fight against Sugar Ray Leonard by repeating, “No mas, No mas”? Maybe Roberto’s cry is really the goal – the complete elimination of Christmas, period.

Secondly, the baby Claus wouldn’t be born today. He would have been aborted by the mother who would see him as a choice and not a life. Maybe she would have gone for “tax free family planning” services as soon as she learned she was pregnant, or perhaps she would have been immediately uncertain about what to do, and waited to have a late term abortion without her parents consent. It is clear that she would have never left the red-headed Claus on the doorstep of the Kringle’s to be found, reared, and trained to make an enormous difference in so many children’s lives.

Since the baby who became Kris Kringle never would have been born, it really makes no difference, but the elf family the Kringle’s, never would have had a toy factory either. If these less than perfect children avoided the abortion doctor’s “treatment” and actually grew to be adults, the system would have cast them as victims due to their “disability” and they would have been “counseled” to be self indulgent louts living off the legal settlement that a “highly respected” trial lawyer was able to extract from the physician who made a tragic mistake during the their delivery that caused them to be, not elves, but “little people”. Forget moving to the North Pole and setting out to build toys for children who would watch out, choose to be good, and nice, instead of crying, pouting and being bad. Of course, you can’t speak about a child as being bad, or even as misbehaving anymore – that would “ruin his self esteem”.


Not that any of that matters, because you sure can’t build a toy factor at the North Pole. For one, it’s allegedly no longer frozen there because of man-made Global Warming. If by chance (certainly not an act of God though) or by species crossing evolution, the water were to refreeze, extremist environmentalists would protest placing a factory there by stealing the building materials, sabotaging the construction equipment, and if that didn’t work, flat out burning the place down. All that breathing, oh the carbon dioxide and other lethal green house gases that would be released! Of course the fact that when water does freeze, it is the only substance that floats so as to avoid crushing all marine life, gives a clear indication of evolution, the big bang, and random spontaneous appearance of matter – it couldn’t possibly be evidence of divine design and/or intelligent creation. Yet, how man can simultaneously be “basically good” while intentionally and irresponsibly destroying his environment is a contradiction that draws no conversation or question. 


No doubt the Grinch would be alive and well, surviving quite nicely, even thriving, in the current environment. He probably would have invented the internet or something like it. One thing is certain - no one in the current government or in the mainstream press would accuse him of “stealing” Christmas. He might be lauded for giving us an unconstitutional “experiment which may ultimately reduce health care costs ” called health care reform. He might be considered a genius for designing a system that causes profitable, jobs providing, businesses to move to countries that have no pollution standards of any kind, by creating something called “cap and trade”. He might be an “enlightened” congressman from a blue state or an unelected, constitutionally questionable, militant, practicing homosexual, czar in charge of educating the country’s children. But he won’t, under any circumstances, be called to task for stealing. 

Charlie Brown doesn’t fare quite as well, but he does live a “dignified” life. Shortly after his diagnosis, he is allowed to miss work indefinitely, with government mandated pay of course, because of his mental “disease”. His company pays for his “treatment” (just like any other illness) for twelve years but “falsely” and unfairly accuses him goldbricking and stops paying. Health care reform kicks in and at age 50 he enters Medicare and government support, never working again. Having seen all the episodes of Married with Children, he is asked by Lucy to be the director of the holiday play, but declines when he learns that a “holiday play” has absolutely no point (except to avoid “offending” anyone with any mention of Jesus Christ). He never buys a “nice little tree”, and never sees it decorated - all on account of rainforest concerns about cutting down trees grown specifically for decoration. Charlie remains a blockhead until a government death “counselor” suggests that his constant back pain, as a result of kicking footballs, and the costs of treating his condition, could end. Charlie takes his own life after outliving his usefulness and his government capped health insurance cost threshold, at age 79.


Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer is the one character who is thriving in this environment. He is responsible for coining the phrase redproboscisphobic and in the process eliminating any and all intelligent discussion on the topic. After getting all the other reindeer permanently expelled from school for “bullying” as a result of their refusal to let him play in reindeer games, Rudolph successfully sues the American Psychiatric Association, requiring them to declare red noses as completely normal. In “careful” consideration the APA decides that any attempt to address or “treat” the malady is completely cruel and destructive to the self esteem of the “afflicted”. Rudolph is praised as the first elected, openly red nosed congressman from Massachusetts, sits on powerful house committees, but is never seriously investigated or called to task for his role in the AIG, derivatives, Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and/or banking meltdowns.


Well, there you have it. Be thankful for Christmas. Be grateful that the meaning of Christmas began 2000 years ago, and that the celebration of Christmas started shortly thereafter. If Christmas needed to be started today, in this cultural, legal, and government environment, there’d be no reason to hope or for hope, because you couldn’t get Christmas started today.

More Stories By Dana Barfield

Dana is the president of The Barfield Group, which has provided industry leading Financial Advice, Investment Services, and helped people Plan for Retirement for more than 20 years. He is a frequent speaker and writer for a variety of industry, regional, and national publications on business ownership and wealth building related topics.

@ThingsExpo Stories
The 21st International Cloud Expo has announced that its Call for Papers is open. Cloud Expo, to be held October 31 - November 2, 2017, at the Santa Clara Convention Center in Santa Clara, CA, brings together Cloud Computing, Big Data, Internet of Things, DevOps, Digital Transformation, Machine Learning and WebRTC to one location. With cloud computing driving a higher percentage of enterprise IT budgets every year, it becomes increasingly important to plant your flag in this fast-expanding busin...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Hitachi Data Systems, a wholly owned subsidiary of Hitachi LTD., will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City. Hitachi Data Systems (HDS) will be featuring the Hitachi Content Platform (HCP) portfolio. This is the industry’s only offering that allows organizations to bring together object storage, file sync and share, cloud storage gateways, and sophisticated search and...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Peak 10, Inc., a national IT infrastructure and cloud services provider, will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Peak 10 provides reliable, tailored data center and network services, cloud and managed services. Its solutions are designed to scale and adapt to customers’ changing business needs, enabling them to lower costs, improve performance and focus intern...
SYS-CON Events announced today that delaPlex will exhibit at SYS-CON's @CloudExpo, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. delaPlex pioneered Software Development as a Service (SDaaS), which provides scalable resources to build, test, and deploy software. It’s a fast and more reliable way to develop a new product or expand your in-house team.
SYS-CON Events announced today that Progress, a global leader in application development, has been named “Bronze Sponsor” of SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Enterprises today are rapidly adopting the cloud, while continuing to retain business-critical/sensitive data inside the firewall. This is creating two separate data silos – one inside the firewall and the other outside the firewall. Cloud ISVs oft...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Cloud Academy will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Cloud Academy is the industry’s most innovative, vendor-neutral cloud technology training platform. Cloud Academy provides continuous learning solutions for individuals and enterprise teams for Amazon Web Services, Microsoft Azure, Google Cloud Platform, and the most popular cloud computing technologies. Ge...
Existing Big Data solutions are mainly focused on the discovery and analysis of data. The solutions are scalable and highly available but tedious when swapping in and swapping out occurs in disarray and thrashing takes place. The resolution for thrashing through machine learning algorithms and support nomenclature is through simple techniques. Organizations that have been collecting large customer data are increasingly seeing the need to use the data for swapping in and out and thrashing occurs ...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Interoute has been named “Bronze Sponsor” of SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Interoute is the owner operator of Europe's largest network and a global cloud services platform, which encompasses over 70,000 km of lit fiber, 15 data centers, 17 virtual data centers and 33 colocation centers, with connections to 195 additional partner data centers. Our full-service Unifie...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Fusion, a leading provider of cloud services, will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Fusion, a leading provider of integrated cloud solutions to small, medium and large businesses, is the industry’s single source for the cloud. Fusion’s advanced, proprietary cloud service platform enables the integration of leading edge solutions in the cloud, including cloud...
DevOps is often described as a combination of technology and culture. Without both, DevOps isn't complete. However, applying the culture to outdated technology is a recipe for disaster; as response times grow and connections between teams are delayed by technology, the culture will die. A Nutanix Enterprise Cloud has many benefits that provide the needed base for a true DevOps paradigm.
Detecting internal user threats in the Big Data eco-system is challenging and cumbersome. Many organizations monitor internal usage of the Big Data eco-system using a set of alerts. This is not a scalable process given the increase in the number of alerts with the accelerating growth in data volume and user base. Organizations are increasingly leveraging machine learning to monitor only those data elements that are sensitive and critical, autonomously establish monitoring policies, and to detect...
SYS-CON Events announced today that WineSOFT will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Based in Seoul and Irvine, WineSOFT is an innovative software house focusing on internet infrastructure solutions. The venture started as a bootstrap start-up in 2010 by focusing on making the internet faster and more powerful. WineSOFT’s knowledge is based on the expertise of TCP/IP, VPN, SSL, peer-to-peer, mob...
SYS-CON Events announced today that DivvyCloud will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. DivvyCloud software enables organizations to achieve their cloud computing goals by simplifying and automating security, compliance and cost optimization of public and private cloud infrastructure. Using DivvyCloud, customers can leverage programmatic Bots to identify and remediate common cloud problems in rea...
SYS-CON Events announced today that HTBase will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. HTBase (Gartner 2016 Cool Vendor) delivers a Composable IT infrastructure solution architected for agility and increased efficiency. It turns compute, storage, and fabric into fluid pools of resources that are easily composed and re-composed to meet each application’s needs. With HTBase, companies can quickly prov...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Linux Academy, the foremost online Linux and cloud training platform and community, will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Linux Academy was founded on the belief that providing high-quality, in-depth training should be available at an affordable price. Industry leaders in quality training, provided services, and student certification passes, its goal is to c...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Systena America will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Systena Group has been in business for various software development and verification in Japan, US, ASEAN, and China by utilizing the knowledge we gained from all types of device development for various industries including smartphones (Android/iOS), wireless communication, security technology and IoT serv...
SYS-CON Events announced today that CollabNet, a global leader in enterprise software development, release automation and DevOps solutions, will be a Bronze Sponsor of SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, taking place from June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. CollabNet offers a broad range of solutions with the mission of helping modern organizations deliver quality software at speed. The company’s latest innovation, the DevOps Lifecycle Manager (DLM), supports Value S...
SYS-CON Events announced today that Infranics will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Since 2000, Infranics has developed SysMaster Suite, which is required for the stable and efficient management of ICT infrastructure. The ICT management solution developed and provided by Infranics continues to add intelligence to the ICT infrastructure through the IMC (Infra Management Cycle) based on mathemat...
SYS-CON Events announced today that SoftLayer, an IBM Company, has been named “Gold Sponsor” of SYS-CON's 18th Cloud Expo, which will take place on June 7-9, 2016, at the Javits Center in New York, New York. SoftLayer, an IBM Company, provides cloud infrastructure as a service from a growing number of data centers and network points of presence around the world. SoftLayer’s customers range from Web startups to global enterprises.
SYS-CON Events announced today that Loom Systems will exhibit at SYS-CON's 20th International Cloud Expo®, which will take place on June 6-8, 2017, at the Javits Center in New York City, NY. Founded in 2015, Loom Systems delivers an advanced AI solution to predict and prevent problems in the digital business. Loom stands alone in the industry as an AI analysis platform requiring no prior math knowledge from operators, leveraging the existing staff to succeed in the digital era. With offices in S...